Bimbo

Now it can be told. The biggest majority of the Debra Chase by Herself series in the Sunday Shocker, which I am sposed to of written, was a load of rubbish, a virago of lies from start to finish.

Thus does Page Three celebrity Debra Chase set out to put the record straight about her life in the tabloid fast-lane and the early years when she was still known as Marjory Linda Chase, growing up in Seathorpe with her Dad and Step-Mum Babs, in those far-off days of the forgotten Seventies.

Debra tells the story of her climb to stardom from the Donna Bella Rosa School of Fashion and how she met "The Sir", Sir Monty Pratt, the bonking baronet who so adored her and who was so compromised by that story in the Shocker. She reveals the Debra Chase Diet Muffin Scandal and her part in it, as well as her on-off affair with hunky goal-ace, Brian Boffe.

By turns outrageously funny and uncannily affecting, BIMBO is a masterpiece of entertainment and virtuoso characterisation from one of our finest novelists.