But Seriously, Do Less

A practical and empowering blueprint for raising more resilient kids by urging parents to give up on the idea of a failure-free childhood and letting kids make their own mistakes—from an adolescent psychiatrist whos seen it all.

Parents today are really good at advocating for their children. The flip side of this well-meaning flex, however, is seriously problematic. Because as Dr. Amy Funkenstein explains, having to do hard things for yourself is one of the primary ways humans mature. When we deny our kids the opportunity to figure things out on their own, we have only ourselves to blame when they are twenty-something and still living in the basement!

Drawing on Dr. Funkenstein’s long experience working with families, her patient stories, and a handful of unforgettable anecdotes from her eccentric Jewish mother, But Seriously, Do Less will:

give parents the foundational knowledge, scripts, and tips to confidently intervene less and watch the natural consequences teach a lesson better than we ever could on our own teach readers the unsung skill of being spectacularly unhelpful when asked to help solve problems guide us to model imperfection so that our kids don’t get the wrong idea about us as role models.
Grounded in trustworthy developmental science but with an irreverence that helps the medicine go down, But Seriously, Do Less gives parents the permission to stop helicoptering, hovering, and lawnmowing a failure-free path to adulthood and yet still raise more independent, resilient, confident children.